American comedies directed by Kevin Smith, starring Brian O'Halloran, Jeff Anderson and Jason Mewes.
A reluctant convenience store clerk is friends with the inattentive clerk of the video store next door. A drug dealer and his friend hang out in front of the shops. In Clerks II, the characters are at a fast food restaurant, in Dogma, the drug dealer and friend try to help a woman to prevent fallen angels from entering a church and in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, the guys outside the stores go to Hollywood to claim money for a movie being made about them.
Another set! I'm not including the animated Jay and Silent Bob film or the 2019 sequel to Strike Back. I've seen Dogma many times and Strike Back came out when I was in college the first time and my friends watched it lots. The humor in these films seems awkward, crude and irreverent, even to me. Dante gets on my nerves a little bit and Jay's jokes are only about sex and ganja. Clerks 1 being in all black and white was a little daring for Kevin Smith's first film in 1994. All of them looked fine, except that Strike Back looked a little too Hollywood to me. I rate the set o.k. and you should watch it if your sense of humor is crude and irreverent.
I am now realizing why I did not review the films I've seen so many times. It's hard to think of something to write about a movie I know so well that I can watch it in my head.
A South Korean crime black comedy directed by Won Shin-Yeon, starring Lee Moon-sik and Oh Dal-su.
A professor and student get pulled over by a cop, angering the professor. He provokes the cop and then hides on a dead end side road. After trying to seduce the student, she runs away. A gang of criminals show up and engege the cop, professor and student in their violence.
Oh wow! The plot held my attention all the way through, making me want to know what happened. I didn't really care about the characters because of what was happening. They were good though. Imagine a South Korean Gummo (1997) cast, but a few years later. The video had lots of hand held shots, but this did not get in the way. It was high quality Breaking Bad style hand held camera. There was also punctuation through a train passing and the main tormentor of the scene saying "nothing happened here today". Looking at other sites, people didn't seem to like this as much as I do. I'm rating it awesome because it has style and plot. However, this is not one to repeat watch. The first time through, you want to know what happens next. Watching again would destroy that.
A Canadian horror directed by Warren P. Sonoda, starring Ron Perlman.
A group of 5 girls are the first class of a catholic school where a girl disappeared 5 years before. The headmistress is trying to sacrifice them to bring back the missing girl.
Terrible. When I'm counting down minutes until a movie ends, it's really bad. The plot was basic and not very interesting. The characters were underdeveloped to the point that it was not made clear that one of the girls had an eating disorder until she became posessed. Video was alright, but there was too much CG. Some physical effects mixed in would have blurred the line between live action and digital effects, but nobody does that. I want page views, so here's some tits (image). Audio was muffled, compressed and bass-heavy. It may have just been the copy I got, but I think there were original master copy mixing issues as well. If you like The Craft (1996) and Stigmata (1999) and want to know what would happen if they mixed and turned to crap, this is it. I rate it shit. Do not watch!
An American action thriller directed by Richard Donner, starring Bruce Willis, Mos Def and David Morse.
A detective has to escort a witness to trial, but stops and leaves the car on the way. A man with a gun approaches the witness in the car, but the detective shoots this man before he can kill the witness. The detective and witness hide in a bar and call for backup, but the crooked cops who arrive want to kill the witness. The detective disagrees and the chase starts.
How appropriate to watch after 13th (2016). Here is a film about that exact type of police brutality, black targeting and prison industrial complex, but a white cop breaks routine to expose corruption. The plot held my attention and the characters fit together well in it. I liked the team of Bruce Willis and Mos Def. I liked Mos Def's riddle:
"You're driving in a hurricane and you see three people at a bus stop.
One is an old lady and she's sick. One is your best friend and he saved
your life. And the third is the lady of your dreams. Now check it out,
you only have room for one in your car, which one do you take?"
and Bruce Willis' answer:
"You give your car keys to your best friend, who takes your car and
drives the old lady to a hospital. You stay behind with the love of your
life."
Production was typical of modern action films. There was lots of moving camera and lots of fast editing. Audio was slightly better, with less whispering and mumbling than I expected from the year. I rate this o.k. because I could take it or leave it. You may want to consider watching it.
An American crime drama written and directed by Gary Lennon, starring Milla Jovovich, Angus Macfadyen and Stephen Dorff.
A woman has an abusive husband and a lesbian partner/friend. Between the woman, lesbian, a social worker and one of the husband's friends, they plan to take revenge on the husband.
This had a very simple plot, but the style worked well. Between some scenes, there were interview segments with people related to the characters. The husband's mother got violent at a thanksgiving turkey she was cooking and the woman's mother got shouted at by her husband. The video all looked fine, but there were serious audio problems. It was almost all whispered dialogue. I don't feel like writing any more about this. I rate it o.k. watch it if you want.
A British Canadian American crime action directed by Tony Giglio, starring Jason Statham and Wesley Snipes.
There is a bank robbery and a cop who was fired is asked for by the robbers. He gets a new partner and they try to find the bank robbers who escaped after an explosion during the robbery.
Bad audio, probably the worst mixing I've ever heard. There was whispered and mumbled dialogue alternating with loud music, explosions, motorcycles (need those) and guns. Which brings me to my next point: motorcycle chases. Every crappy action flick I've been watching recently has a motorcycle chase scene. It's possible that folks were trying to ride coattails on The Matrix trilogy (1999 - 2003) and Kill Bill (2003 - 2004) because all of these crappy flicks with motorcycle chases were made around that time and those were popular and good films with motorcycle chases. Is there some deep meaning hidden within the motorcycle chase that I'm missing? Most of them slide their bikes to a halt. While stopping, the wheels slide out from under them and the body scrapes across the pavement, creating sparks. I usually like Jason Statham's acting, but his dialogue must have been under my hearing threshold in this. That's all there was to that movie. I couldn't understand much of what anyone was saying because the audio was so bad. I rate it bad. Really, don't watch it.
A British documentary produced by Jemima Harrison for BBC Two.
Scientists study an inbred family in Turkey whose children are quadrupedal.
So stupid. It all seemed contrived and forced. I would hope that this is not how real scientists act. They acted more like modern sit-com characters than professional anythings. In fact, the video should never have been made. As soon as the children turned out to be inbred and brain damaged, that should preclude any further investigation. I turned it off and am rating it shit. Do not watch!
A British American documentary by Eric Steel.
The Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco California is a popular suicide destination. Interviews are interspersed with footage of the bridge and jumps.
So slow! If this were a book, it would have half a sentence per page and tons of blank pages between sentences. It seems like Eric there wanted to stretch a 10 minute mini-doc into a feature length film. The interviews weren't all that great, just relatives complaining about their non-conformist child/cousin/sibling/friend who jumped. Then the climax came at the end. The guy with long dark hair who was pacing the bridge through the whole duration executed a remarkable jump. That was the best part. Otherwise, it was painful to watch because of so much B-roll and dead air. I rate this bad because it wasn't bad enough to turn off. You would really be better off watching something that makes better use of time.
An American documentary directed by Jon Fauer.
Cinematographers are interviewed about their jobs.
This was a little bit of a special interest piece. You need to be really into how movies are made to see value in it. I watched the extended/extras version with 2 full hour long interviews added to the hour and a half feature duration for a total of 3 and a half hours because I'm really into how movies are made. Information density was there if you know what they're talking about. Each interviewee explains some of the aspects of what a cinematographer does and how the quality of this work is determined. There were tons of interviewees: 110 of them! Given my high level of interest in the subject matter, even I found this a little on the dry side and was easily distracted while watching it. My mind tended to wander some while these folks were talking. Too bad the cinematography on this documentary was so poor. Each interviewee was filmed from only one camera on a tripod. If you watch the extras, you find out that the camera operator was moving the camera around as well as zooming in and out while they were filming. To be clear, more cameras or shot positions with less movement would have been better. The audio all sounded great to me. I could hear the monologues very clearly and there was not much dynamic range of volume. IMDb has a rating of 7.1/10 listed, Apple iTunes has 3.6/5 and Rotten Tomatoes lists 61% Audience Score for an average of 68%. I think that I agree with the barely passing grade. I rate it poor.
A Dutch science fiction directed by Ben Sombogaart.
A soccer player from modern times used his mother's time travel device and accidentally ends up in the 13th century. He joins the children's crusade and tries to help the children while he waits for his mother to find him and warp him back.
Horrible. This is a prime example of New Hollywood Bullshit, even though it was not made in Hollywood. The 2 hour duration seemed to take forever. The premise and plot were not extremely bad, but there were jumpy sections in which events were not clearly presented. I hated all the characters, but the Nicolaas priest actor looked like the bassist from a band I played in (image). Poorly written dialogue and sub-par acting made me hate the characters even more. Sets were pretty basic besides the CG castles, but the costumes looked authentic. Camera-work and editing were disasters. There were way too many shots that were too close to tell a convincing story and the editing was all far too quick. The single, repeated special effect of the time warp got old very fast. If that wasn't bad enough already, audio is where this really irked me. The bread baking scene with all the kids singing Queen's "We Are the Chamions" was too hokey for words. This won 5 awards, has a 6.1/10 on IMDB and 44% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes. I don't get how it won awards with a 52.5% average F grade. I agree with the average grade, but not the awards. I rate this bad for wrecking a Queen song more than it has already been wrecked and for making me hate the characters. I should have turned it off and rated it shit.
An American documentary directed by Roy Frumkes.
The story of the making of Street Trash (1987) is told with interviews and clips.
A very complete presentation. I appreciated the 2 hour duration because I like to hear about making movies and I liked Street Trash. Don't stop watching when the credits roll either. There are hidden gems mixed in there. The information density was moderate. It seemed like a nice blend of serious information and comedic entertainment to me. The "plot" of this doc goes from pre-production planning, through filming and release and a "where are they now" type of segment at the end which even includes views of the filming locations. Interviewees were chosen very well. Almost the entire cast and crew were represented. Camera-work was not the best, but not bad. There was pretty much one angle per interviewee and this was mixed with clips from the film, deleted scenes, still photos and important text that was worth reading. There were varying video qualities and exposures between different video elements. The same can be said for audio. The newest interviews mostly looked and sounded best. An exception to this was the Christian cast member whose microphone was too far away. The old footage of cast and crew making the actual film was worst in both areas. This has a 8.0/10 on IMDB and the reviewer on DVD Talk seemed to like it quite a bit. I rate it good for subject matter and completeness.
An American documentary.
The conventions and standards of American slasher horror films are discussed with examples.
This was not as good as Eaten Alive! TRAFOICF. It focused more on the obvious, mainstream hits of the genre without digging much deeper. This time, the hour and a half seemed to drag. The information density was much lower and it seemed more like an infotainment Discovery channel production. The interviewees were just as good, being filmmakers and stars along with writers. The subject matter was much more mainstream and "pop culture" than Eaten Alive!, which I did not appreciate. Most of the interviews had the same static camera angle, but a couple of them mixed it up a little bit. The audio was mixed well, but the Halloween theme just kept coming back in the soundtrack over and over. The style of this film was much less academic than Eaten Alive! as well. This got a 7.3/10 on IMDB and I agree with a C- grade because it just wasn't that great. I rate this o.k. for mediocrity.
An American music documentary directed by Rick Ernst.
Exactly what the title says. A history of the music scene in this genre and interviews with bands and musicians.
This is the stuff that I grew up listening to. I think that they did a good job of presenting the material in chronological order. They didn't leave much out. I would have liked to hear the Megadeth sneaker story though. Discussion of Metallica's post-Burton career would have added some depth as well as discussion of power metal, which was totally absent. Black and death metal were mentioned, but with no samples or interviews. The interviewees were chosen well and the content of the interviews was excellent. Camera angles were lacking though. It was one camera angle per interviewee and most were straight on. The shots were not composed very well either. My favorite interviewee was Blitz from Overkill because he had a sense of humor. The inclusion of stills of vintage photos, posters and ticket stubs was a good idea and I don't think this would have worked without those. Music video clips would have added a whole new dimension. The audio was impeccable. The interview dialogue was mixed well with samples of music, including fade ins and outs. I rate this good because the content was there, but production was just slightly lacking. Watch it if you like heavy metal.
An American documentary directed by Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady.
An Evangelical children's pastor runs a religious summer camp. The pastor and some of the children speak about their beliefs.
Let's put religion aside for a moment and look at production. The interviews featured interviewees speaking about their strong beliefs and was accompanied by B-roll of the group engaged in their activities. The pastor pissed me off and I know she's stupid. A prime example is when she's talking bad about people being fat and she's over 300lbs. The video all looked like it was shot well and I could hear all of the dialogue very clearly. The editing was a little less than creative and unique, but got the point across. I don't think that the filmmakers intended any bias in their work. However, I think that it lacked direction and dynamics. Now for religion. These people have the best intentions, but they are flat out wrong. Every religion has puzzle pieces that make up the true nature of existence. The Evangelical Christians have 10 (commandments) out of a puzzle of a few thousand pieces. Their power metal is also quite epic. Unfortunately, religion is a decision and concept that I think only adults are capable of making and understanding. I say let the kids be kids while they can because they can get into religion if they want to when they are old enough to make an informed decision. Overall, a well made documentary about wrongly brainwashing children. I rate this poor because it's a complex subject matter that I don't think was covered sufficiently.
A Japanese horror thriller directed by Manabu Asou.
A group of college students on a class trip receive messages on their phones from a girl who they used to pick on. The messages indicate that the receiver will die soon. One student reveals a secret about her past that changes the message sending girl.
This was not so hot. The plot went almost nowhere. It was coherent, but one of the more static plots I've seen. The characters were pitifully shallow. It may have been a "lost in translation" issue there. The video was alright, but nothing stood out as being good. I won't comment on the audio because it was in Japanese, but the subtitles that came with the version I watched were horrible. Overall, a lackluster and mediocre film. I rate it tolerable.
A British Austrian Netherlands documentary directed by Sophie Fiennes, starring Slavoj Zizek.
Slavoj Zizek explains his views on how psychology relates to film with examples from famous movies.
This is part of my research into movies about movies. I realized that I had seen so many films and was getting to the end of my university education that I needed to learn about film from a perspective outside the classroom and the screen itself. Slavoj may not be the best teacher in this field, but I think that his wild style and "outside the box" ideas make him a good teacher for me. I grasped his ideas on Freudian psychology immediately. I could see how the Marx brothers and the levels of the house in Psycho relate directly to the Id, the Ego and the Super-Ego. I also think that I understood his discussion of a "gaze" being returned by inanimate objects. His flower comment questions a long-standing universal opinion by pointing out the blatantly obvious. He went into discussions on fantasy vs. reality and borders between spaces. I had to watch this twice because of his frenetic pace and the depth of material that he covers. I wish my professors would discuss ideas and theories at this level. Overall, this is something that folks will understand or not. Those that get it will find a wealth of knowledge and probing questions. Those that don't get it will call it crazy and stupid trash, projecting their own stupidity upon the thing that pointed out their lack of intelligence. I rate this awesome and am about to begin watching the sequel on ideology.
A Russian animated romance directed by Aleksandr Petrov.
A 16 year old boy begins romantic relationships with a girl who is his friend and a slightly older woman.
My stop-motion and animation senses went gaga over this. Oil paint on glass is something that must be seen and enjoyed. The plot and characters were simple because of the 26 minute duration, but the video was amazing. It's like a series of impressionist paintings that move. That is the best way to describe this marvel. So what if the audio is in Russian? I barely read the English subtitles because I was all googly-eyed about the animation. I rate this best. WATCH IT!!!
An American disaster action thriller directed by Wolfgang Petersen, starring Kurt Russell and Richard Dreyfuss.
A remake of the 1972 film. A large ship is sinking because it has capsized. People try to make their way out through the bottom of the upside down boat.
This was very much like the 2005 remake of the same, but worse in all the ways that the 2005 version was worse than the 1972 original. The plot was simplistic: get out of the boat or drown. The characters were not developed at all because so much time was devoted to building tension and having action scenes. The video was choppy and fast. It featured close, underexposed shots that were edited with quick cuts. There were a few special effects with fire and water. The audio was mostly screaming and shouting with building symphonic music. The intro featured a white woman singing like she was black. Is that a reverse oreo? Overall, not worth the time it took to watch. Luckily, there were 10 minutes of credits at the end. I rate it bad. DO NOT WATCH!!!
An American comedy drama directed by Barry Levinson, starring Robin Williams, Christopher Walken and Jeff Goldblum.
A comedy talk show host jokes about running for president. Because of popular response, he does so. A woman at the voting machine company discovers a problem with the voting machines that causes him to actually be elected.
This was not too shabby. It had pros and cons like most normal movies. The plot was good and held my attention. The comedian's political campaign being based on honesty and common sense was awesome. I think that casting went awry with the inclusion of The Walken Beast, but Robin Williams almost leveled that out. The audio and video were pretty normal. I could see and hear what was going on, but didn't notice anything noteworthy. Overall, a regular movie. I rate this o.k.
An American war film directed by Werner Herzog, starring Christian Bale and Steve Zahn.
A fighter jet pilot is flying over Laos during Vietnam when his plane is shot down. He is captured by Viet Cong and spends months in captivity with a group of other Americans.
This was alright. The plot and music were both VERY slow. The characters were memorable. The main character has an enemy-loving complex and one of the other captives is crazy. The guards even had personalities. The video was amazing. It showed everything very clearly and included slow panning nature shots of the jungle. The audio was not so great because most of the characters whispered for most of the film. Overall, not too shabby. I rate this adequate.
