Abduction (2011)

An American action thriller directed by John Singleton, starring Alfred Molina, Jason Isaacs, Maria Bello and Sigourney Weaver.
A young man is being hunted by government agents and spies because of his spy father.
Not very good. Let's start with what other folks thought: paraphrased/compiled
"soulless and incompetent
actual abduction may be preferable to the movie of the same name, but only if your kidnappers don't torture you by forcing you to watch it
Lautner "has the acting chops of Bert from Sesame Street
cringe-worthy dialogue and a wooden leading man
a haggardly slapdash Bourne Identity knockoff"
I was unable to find positive comments. The plot almost held my attention with action sequences. Those were alright, but everything else was terrible. I'm talking fun to mock terrible here. Most of the characters were either cookie cutter or horribly acted. I've seen better acting in TROMA films. What I would like to know is how Sigourney Weaver got roped into this. I wanted her to blow the male and female leads out of the goddamn airlock. I don't have the patience to point out the flaws in every film element on every crappy movie I watch. However, I could hear it, see it and understand the plot. I have to rate this poor because it sucks, but there are so many worse films. Don't watch it.

Abduction (1975)

An American thriller directed by Joseph Zito, starring Leif Erickson and Dorothy Malone.
The daughter of a rich politician is adbucted and held for ransom.
I could not hear this. Maybe I got a bad copy, maybe that is how the film was made. Either way, it sounded extremely muffled. I turned it off in accordance with my new 3-point turn off policy: If I can't see it, hear it or figure out what's happening within the first half, it is then over. The plot seemed clear, but the video was almost as crappy as the sound. Look at the cables of these microphones (image). It's glitching so hard that it looks composited. I rate this shit. Do not watch!

Abandoned (2010)

An American thriller directed by Michael Feifer, starring Brittany Murphy, Dean Cain and Mimi Rogers.
A young woman brings her boyfriend to the hospital for a leg operation. She goes to get coffee and when she gets back, he is gone and nobody has heard of him.
This seemed really low-budget. The plot was actually interesting, but the characters were stale. Anyone who has been in a hospital knows the type of authoritative lack of information that gets communicated there. I would have liked to see more nurses sitting around chatting and a bunch of cops everywhere to make it really accurate. Some more waiting rooms full of people who have been there multiple days would have added authenticity as well. The acting was not so great, but Brittany Murphy was in Clueless (1995), Girl, Interrupted (1999), Spun (2002) and Sin City (2005). Video looked like an updated version of cheap 1980s B movies, but the audio was really good. Here's what really counts: I did not like it. It seemed too contrived and forced to me. I rate it tolerable because although it had some good stuff going on, it just didn't pan out to be an entertaining film.

8mm 2 (2005)

A Hungarian American mystery thriller directed by J. S. Cardone, starring Johnathon Schaech.
A man and his rich fiancee are on vacation and have a threesome with a woman they meet at the hotel. He then receives photos of them from someone wanting money.
Really terrible. 8mm (1999) was bad enough, but a "sequel" like this is too much. It only borrowed the part of the plot involving someone having sex videos and had a different name in production. Characters and dialogue seemed like a cut and paste job from every other low budget thriller ever made. When Wikipedia says a film is "direct-to-video", that is always a very bad sign. It may not always turn out to be this horrible, but most are. There are only so many ways to say that a movie is bad. The only positive thing I can say is that there was plenty of nudity. If that's all you're looking for, go watch porn instead. I rate this shit because it is. Do not watch!

16 Blocks (2006)

An American action thriller directed by Richard Donner, starring Bruce Willis, Mos Def and David Morse.
A detective has to escort a witness to trial, but stops and leaves the car on the way. A man with a gun approaches the witness in the car, but the detective shoots this man before he can kill the witness. The detective and witness hide in a bar and call for backup, but the crooked cops who arrive want to kill the witness. The detective disagrees and the chase starts.
How appropriate to watch after 13th (2016). Here is a film about that exact type of police brutality, black targeting and prison industrial complex, but a white cop breaks routine to expose corruption. The plot held my attention and the characters fit together well in it. I liked the team of Bruce Willis and Mos Def. I liked Mos Def's riddle:
"You're driving in a hurricane and you see three people at a bus stop. One is an old lady and she's sick. One is your best friend and he saved your life. And the third is the lady of your dreams. Now check it out, you only have room for one in your car, which one do you take?"
and Bruce Willis' answer:
"You give your car keys to your best friend, who takes your car and drives the old lady to a hospital. You stay behind with the love of your life."
Production was typical of modern action films. There was lots of moving camera and lots of fast editing. Audio was slightly better, with less whispering and mumbling than I expected from the year. I rate this o.k. because I could take it or leave it. You may want to consider watching it.

13 (2010)

An American thriller remake directed by Gela Babluani, starring Ray Winstone, Alexander Skarsgard, Mickey Rourke and Jason Statham.
An electrician steals a ticket to a game from a man who dies in the house he is wiring. The game involves men betting large amounts of money on modified versions of Russian Roulette.
Interestingly, Gela Babluani directed this, the original Tzameti 13 (2005) and 2 other obscure films. I have to say I liked Tzameti much more. This was like a dumbed down American version of that. If I remember correctly, the original was all in black and white. The plot of this did not hold my attention very well and the characters were shallow. Anything made after 2000 by a major film company is going to look at least alright. If Mickey Rourke and Jason Statham could be afforded, then decent cameras would have been used. The sound was kind of off, but I think that was the fault of whoever digitized and uploaded it. It sounded muffled and mid-rangey. What is most difficult to describe is the difference in "weight" between this and the original. Things in that seemed important because of film elements working together for emphasis. This seemed trivial all the way through, like a modern version of the 1980s Full Moon one-off flicks. I rate this tolerable. Considering how many options are out there, you would be better off watching something else.

'71 (2014)

A British action thriller directed by Yann Demange.
During conflict in Ireland, a soldier is separated from his group. He tries to find his way back to military headquarters while the opposing side has people searching for him.
Dumb. First, 2 things I noticed. After the bar bomb, the handhgeld camera works really well. It conveys confusion and disorientation perfectly. In some sections, there was a deep "boom boom boom etc..." sound that went on for too long at too high a volume. Anyway... The plot held my attention like a wet paper bag full of sledgehammers. No characters were developed at all. None. I think the video was the best part, with varied shots and good composition and movement. The audio was worst. It was almost all whispered dialogue in thick Irish accent. I rate it tolerable because it wasn't bad, just not good. You might not want to watch this.

10 Cloverfield Lane (2016)

An American thriller directed by Dan Trachtenberg, starring John Goodman.
A woman has a car accident and wakes up in a basement. It turns out to be a fallout shelter under a farm. The man who built it has his construction assistant and her locked in because of chemical dangers in the outside air. When they find that the man is not being honest, the woman and assistant work on escaping.
This seemed like it needed a sequel, but it actually is a sequel to Cloverfield (2008). The plot definitely held my attention and the characters were memorable. John Goodman's character was deepest, the woman was shallow until the ending (not spoiling) and the assistant was on the shallow side. It definitely looked better than Cloverfield because it wasn't "found footage" style. Lighting and exposure were correct and there were some varied shots. The audio was pretty decent, but I think some of the subtitles were a little screwy. Special effects at the end looked convincing, but I would have liked to get a better view of the fictional items. Maybe that was intentional. It made me want to watch The Cloverfield Paradox (2018). I rate this adequate. You might want to check it out.

Jamaica Inn (1939)

A British crime thriller directed by Alfred Hitchcock, starring Charles Laughton and Maureen O'Hara.
A young woman goes to stay with her aunt, but finds there are criminals there, working for a rich man who lives nearby.
Michael Medved put this in his "The Fifty Worst Films of All Time" book, and for good reason. The video was all underexposed and the audio was full of loud background noise that chopped off abruptly for indoor scenes. This was to the point that it physically hurt to watch. I got a headache from it. The plot could not hold my attention and was not clearly presented. There were too many characters with not enough screen time to identify them. All of the rich guy's servants and all of the criminals were just a mess. The rich guy also had old guests who just sat at the table for a single scene. Dialogue was a major problem because of wave sounds. There was no whisper acting, but sometimes even shouting would not cut through the waves. There was also fast talking and in British dialect, making it nearly incoherent to this American. Point is, I don't think there was anything that was not a problem in this. When I go looking for images of 16:9 films, I get 4:3 chopdowns, so obviously I found tons of 16:9 chopdowns of this 4:3 movie. I rate it shit because it actually did hurt to watch. DO NOT WATCH!

In the Cut (2003)

A British Australian American mystery thriller directed by Jane Campion, starring Meg Ryan, Mark Ruffalo and Jennifer Jason Leigh.
A teacher gets involved with a detective after he thinks she might be a witness to a murder. She thinks that he might be the murderer because of a tattoo on his wrist.
This was not so great. The plot was really muddy and not clearly presented, but what was there was not very interesting. The characters were a little shallow, but the detective showed more depth than I thought he would as the plot progressed. There was a variety of camera-work going on as well as editing. My favorite was a dream sequence involving the main character's parents ice skating. There was far too much whisper acting going on. The sister was using "eigh" vowel replacements constantly and most of her dialogue was slurred gibberish. It wasn't really bad, but it sure wasn't good. I rate this poor. You probably should not watch it.

I Know Who Killed Me (2007)

An American thriller directed by Chris Sivertson.
A pair of twin girls are abducted and tortured by the same man. One of them has escaped and is mistaken for the other. She has to find the man in order to prove her identity.
This was nominated for 9 Golden Raspberries and won 8 of them. I think Lindsay Lohan may have some of the blame here and feel no compunction about spoilers. The whole disjointed mess was rife with bad acting, but what really took a dook on it was the antagonist reveal: It was her piano teacher! AAAAGH! Bad writing, bad acting, didn't feel continuous, pacing was lurchy, awards for worst movie... The piano teacher thing almost makes it funny. What was not funny was gore special effects. Watching Lindsay sew her own decaying finger back on disturbed even me. I rate this bad because I've seen worse. If you do watch it, try to find some humor.

Homecoming (2009)

An American horror thriller directed by Morgan J. Freeman, starring Mischa Barton.
A football star returns to his hometown from college with a new girlfriend. The old girlfriend had to stay there and wants him back at the cost of the new girl.
Really cheesy and stereotypical. Otherwise, I'm stumped. I can't think of anything that was really bad about this, but there was definitely nothing good. Predictable. It was on a list of the "worst films ever", but was too mediocre to be there. I rate it tolerable. There are so many better films around, watch them instead.

Evidence (2013)

An American crime thriller directed by Olatunde Osunsanmi, starring Harry Lennix, Dale Dickey and Radha Mitchell.
Cops are trying to solve a crime by using recorded video evidence. Some people had been on their way to Las Vegas when their car crashed. One of them was a filmmaker and others had cameras with them.
Crap. There's no other way to describe this. If it had been mocking "found footage" horror and crime films, it would have been good. It was clearly not doing so. How everything was done was so stereotypical. The cops make a "breakthrough" on the case at a set time, whispered dialogue, tense music, young and (currently believed to be) pretty actresses... It was all just so predictable. My favorite scene was when the cops find the last memory card and act like it has to be searched right then. Like the video data was going to expire or fall off the card soon. "I've got the chip!" I rate this bad. Don't watch it.
I've noticed a trend on my blog over the past year or so. It seems to only get views on lewd and prurient content. Whether I typed something about sex or nudity or posted an image of nudity, those seem to be the only posts getting any noticeable traffic. Everything else gets like 2 views when I post it and I have 5 followers. It's just sad that nobody really cares about anything else. I know that the age of the blog has ended and everyone is using twitter, tumblr, instagram, youtube and facebook to the exclusion of any other site. I would like to thank the few people who actually see this for their loyalty. Everyone else can go enjoy their corporate advertising.

Dark Tide (2012)

A South African British American action thriller directed by John Stockwell, starring Halle Berry and Ralph Brown.
A woman who used to swim with sharks has broken up with her husband and is now running seal and whale tours on her boat. A rich man contacts the husband and has him convince her to take the rich man out to swim with sharks.
Stupid. I have not seen Halle Berry in a good movie. This was simplistic and the ending was unclear. Most of the duration was taken up by pointless underwater scenes. What little plot there was made me wish that I was not watching it. The characters were extremely shallow: not even cardboard, but paper cutouts. What made this banal and vapid film worse was that it was an hour and 45 minutes long when it could have fit into a 20 minute short. I can only assume that the only reason to watch this would be Halle Berry in a bikini, but in this age of plentiful internet pornography, why bother? I rate this bad because it was not quite as painful to watch as some other recent entries. Don't watch it.

One Hour Photo (2002)

An American drama thriller directed by Mark Romanek, starring Robin Williams, Connie Nielsen and Gary Cole.

The man who prints photos at a super store takes too much interest in a family.

To start with, I didn't think this plot was believable. The characters were shallow, except for Robin Williams and he was way out of character. Casting Mork as a lonely stalker is just absurd. The version that I watched was pixelated to the point of looking psychedelic, but it's not worth reviewing the quality of a digital file at this point. The camera-work and editing seemed too "new Hollywood" to me, but that was just a mark of the time. Besides the bad plot, there is nothing to write about thismovie. I rate it poor. You probably should not watch it.

Wake in Fright A.K.A. Outback (1971)

An Australian American thriller directed by Ted Kotcheff, starring Donald Pleasence.
A school teacher plans to spend his Christmas vacation in Sydney, but loses all of his money by gambling on the way. Stuck in a small town, he is taken in by a rough group of locals.
I think this film deserves special mention because I consider it to be one of the "unsimulated nasties". Other films in this category include Severed Ways (2007 unsimulated defecation) and Cannibal Holocaust (1980 genuine animal slayings). This film depicts a real kangaroo hunt. Although the hunters were licensed and legal, the kangaroos really did get shot and killed on camera. I'm used to watching some nasty stuff, but actually killing kangaroos pushes my boundary. The plot generally depicts a vacation gone wrong and this character's descent from upstanding school teacher to low-life vagabond. The audio was a little bit on the rough side, with too much dynamic range causing some lost dialogue. The video was grainy (what do you expect from 1971 cameras), but exposure and composition were good. I thought that the film's depiction of alcoholism was quite accurate. The main character re-encountering the sheriff was well written. In the beginning, John was just passing through town and the sheriff gets him started with drinking and gambling. In the end, he's worn out from these things and the sheriff buys him beer to cure a hangover. I would recommend this for those who can see past the nastier elements to the good film within or who enjoy those crude bits. I rate it awesome. Watch it!

As Good as Dead (2010)

An American crime thriller directed by Jonathan Mossek, starring Cary Elwes, Andie MacDowell and Frank Whaley.
A photographer is attacked in his apartment by white supremacists who say that he has killed one of their family members. They torture him, but soon begin fighting amongst themselves.
I watched this because I'm watching films that Cary Elwes acted in. For those who don't know, he was Westley in The Princess Bride (1987) and Robin Hood in Men in Tights (1993). I did not want to see such a good actor being tortured for so long. My only other comment is that the ending was completely unexpected. I won't spoil it any more than that. I rate this poor because of who was tortured.

The Exterminating Angel A.K.A. El angel exterminador (1962)

A Mexican thriller directed by Luis Bunuel, starring Silvia Pinal.
Rich dinner guests are trapped in a room of the house where they attended the party. Even though the door is open, they cannot leave. They run out of water and food, lose their humanity and turn against one another.
It was an interesting premise that seems like it would have made a good Twilight Zone episode. An hour and a half seemed a little long though. The plot does develop more fully than my brief description, with different characters acting their parts in the psycho-drama. All of the characters were rich, white and well-dressed, making them difficult to differentiate at times. The doctor always stood out for his age and relative sanity. I could understand a word or few of the Spanish dialogue, but found good English subtitles. The only problem was that "Y" was replaced with "T". The dwarves of Conde Petie in Final Fantasy IX get "hungert", Not Mexican aristocracy. I thought the actors did a great job of going crazy. One woman pulled out her hair and everyone looked haggard in their suits and gowns. Needless to say, not too many sets. There was an exterior and a dining room at the beginning and a church at the end. There were also some exterior shots spread throughout as people outside could not enter the house. Everything else was in the room. Camera-work was not the best I've seen, even accounting for black and white. That honor goes to Fire over England, a dull, but beautifully shot film. I thought the shots stayed too much in mid-range without getting very close or far away and the general compositions just didn't do it for me. There was a disembodied hand special effect and some creative double exposures or layering to make a dream sequence. The audio seemed on for dialogue and there was not much noticeable music (seems to be the current trend). The gritty style and surrealist subject matter definitely reminded me of Un Chien Andalou. IMDb has an 8.2/10 rating listed, AllMovie has 4.5/5 in both AllMovie and user ratings and Rotten Tomatoes has 96% Tomatometer with 93% Audience Score for an average of 90.2%. Why this gets a consensus A- and A Chinese Ghost Story (1987) gets a consensus C- is beyond me, but that doesn't happen here. Not on my blog! I would say it should be reversed. This gets my o.k. rating because I don't think it's as magnificent as everyone else apparently does.

The Last Wave (1977)

An Australian mystery thriller directed by Peter Weir, starring Richard Chamberlain.
A lawyer takes on the case of some aboriginal men accused of murder and finds that his dreams have something to do with their beliefs.
This was alright. The hour and 39 minute duration seemed sparsely populated because the content happened at a relatively slow pace. The plot was almost interesting, but fell just short of really holding my attention. I thought the characters seemed a little bit shallow or poorly written. The dialogue and acting seemed just short of being good too. The main character had a habit of reaching out and touching people he was talking to. costumes and locations seemed to fit and I liked the final set (not spoiling). Most of the special effects were "dream" editing like stuff appearing and disappearing, but the black rain looked a little fake. It seemed to only be raining black on the main character's car windshield. As with most audio, the music was too loud and the dialogue too quiet. I think that the style of this set the stage for films like The Omen (1976), Stigmata (1999) and The Ninth Gate (1999). It's not a bad genre, just not really what interests me. I rate this adequate.

Predestination (2014)

An Australian science fiction thriller directed by Michael and Peter Spierig, starring Ethan Hawke.
A writer walks into a bar and tells their life story to the bartender. The bartender then produces a time travel device and the plot gets strange.
This was pretty interesting for a few reasons. The hour and a half duration seemed too short to me because it left me wanting more. Pacing was relatively quick, but probably slower for the time period. The plot held my interest throughout, but the ending was inconclusive. Hence, why I wanted it to be longer. There was some ambiguity in characters, but that made it more interesting and ending more frustratingly inconclusive. I cared what happened to the people/person in the film and their story was developed. The dialogue and acting seemed natural and there was some narration in scenes when the story was being told which benefited the plot. Sets and costumes fit the varying times depicted, but mostly by being generic. Those that were more stylized almost looked out of place in contrast. I really liked the camera-work. There was good focus and exposure, but the compositions tended to be more centralized than I would have liked. Color correction/grading was done artfully and most of the scenes had a warmer color balance. The special effects were minimal and only happened at time jumps. Audio was of the time, but had a relatively good mix. Although the music and sound effects were louder than dialogue, I could hear what everyone was saying. This won 11 awards out of 30 nominations. IMDB rates it 7.5/10, Rotten Tomatoes has 84% tomatometer with 75% audience score and Metacritic has a 69% metascore for an average of 75.75% C grade. I disagree, arguing that it deserves a B+ at least. The interesting plot, good camera-work and artful color grading lead me to rate it awesome despite the inconclusive ending. Watch it!