Saturday, October 30, 2010

The War on Kids (2009)

A documentary directed by Cevin Soling.
The relationship between kids and school is examined and flaws are pointed out.
This is full of good information and examples. A lot of what they talk about in this film actually happened to me. I don't mean being arrested for pointing a chicken nugget at a teacher, but the psychological assault caused me to withdraw and try not to be noticed for fear of what would happen if I "got out of line". Some of the examples would be funny if they weren't so true. I'm rating it adequate and worthy because it didn't shock the shit out of me, but it was pretty good.

Orwell Rolls in his Grave (2003)

A documentary by Robert Kane Pappas.
The relationship between politics and the media is examined.
This film was full of accurate information and was well presented. That doesn't make it interesting. It was very dull and lacked any shock value. Hence, it gets an o.k.

Labyrinth (1986)

A fantasy by Jim Henson.
A girl who is forced to babysit her younger brother wishes for goblins to take him away and they do. She is then visited by the goblin king and regrets her decision. The goblin king sends her to his maze and gives her 13 hours to get to the center and rescue the baby.
This is a classic 80s movie and gets a green rating for Jim Henson's contributions. David Bowie also makes a cool villain, but that's not why I'm posting about it.
What I want to write about is the new world order programming aspects. The owl (Molloch) takes a baby (people used to sacrifice children to this deity) and gives the girl 13 hours (unlucky number for Templars) to rescue him. On the girl's quest, everything is topsy turvy and nothing is as it seems (see the naming of government organizations like ministry of peace being in charge of war, etc). During one scene, Mr. Bowie calls the goblin who might be helping the girl "Hegel". This is a direct reference to the Hegelian dialectic, or problem - reaction - solution. This is a technique used by the elite to force society to progress towards their goals by presenting a problem (like a false flag terror attack), the people say "what are you going to do about it?" (reaction), and introducing a solution which was their original plan in the first place. The poisoned fruit is anther good example to use. The power elite are waging a biological war on humanity under the flag of Monsanto, the leader in genetically modified foods. Their ideal plan is for everyone to stay "asleep" and out of the way of their plans like the girl fell asleep from eating the fruit. Ludo is a reference to the "tea party" movement or "conspiracy theorists". He is originally a terrifying monster, but once he is understood, he becomes a source of hope in a hopeless situation. Sir Didymus is a representation of all of the people in low positions of power who are "just doing their jobs". The lie is different on all levels, so he thought that he was noble and just by guarding the bridge, when in fact, he was following orders from higher up and not knowing why. in the end, the girl jumps out of the maze, even though it seems that she will fall to her death. She realized that the maze was constructed by the villain to fool her and by jumping from it, she took all of his power away.
I'm not writing this because of dislike for the film, I like this film. I'm writing it to show that the programming is everywhere. If you step back and keep the trees from blocking your view, you just might see a forest.

Friday, October 29, 2010

The Man from Earth (2007)

A drama directed by Richard Schenkman.
A man calls his friends together to say goodbye to them before he moves away. When they show up at his cottage, he claims that he is 14,000 years old and they question him on this.
The whole film takes place at a small cottage in a maximum of 3 rooms, plus directly outside the door. There were no special effects and dialogue was the main action. Despite these facts, the characters were under-developed and the plot was minimal. The ideas about religion and theology that the characters talked about were as true as can be related, given that the main character is not actually Jesus. I'm rating it o.k. because it was alright, but could have been much better.

The Storyteller series (1988)

A fantasy by Jim Henson.
A series of 23 minute episodes based on folk tales.
Jim Henson's puppets and costumes are the main attraction here. The good plots are thanks to old stories that are told using these creations. The original series is very good, but the Greek myths series is less than magical. For anyone who grew up with movies like The Labyrinth and The Dark Crystal, you will like this as much as I do. I'm rating it good.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Mr. Nobody (2010)

A science fiction directed by Jaco Van Dormael.
A man experiences every path that his life could have taken.
Despite the 2 hour running time, I wished this film was longer. It's just that fucking good! This goes beyond my expectations in plot, characters and setting. It's full of love, death, disaster, dreams and metaphysical musings. Special effects were used tastefully and the non-linear plot actually adds to how good it is. I'm giving this my best rating, so go find it and watch it NOW!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Splice (2009)

A science fiction directed by Vincenzo Natali, starring Adrien Brody (who starred in The Pianist).
Gene research scientists add human DNA to an experiment. The resulting creation is strange and they try to hide it from their lab partners.
New science fiction with good special effects doesn't usually float my boat, but this was cool. The genetic creation is the best and most dynamic character as it continually changes. I watched it for entertainment value and I wasn't let down. I'm rating it good.

Vexille (2007)

A CG anime directed by SORI.
Japan cuts itself off from the rest of the world to develop androids for 10 years. When evidence of their progress is seen, a special team enters Japan to find out what's going on. The team is almost destroyed upon entry and one woman joins up with some Japanese "people" to fight for the remains of humanity.
If you liked the CG Appleseed films, this would be a good one for you. The animation has some style to it and the plot kept me interested. On the new world order side of things, the Japanese government (in film) used forced vaccinations "to protect people" in order to control them. I'm rating it worthy because CG isn't my thing, but it was pretty good.

The Phantom of the Opera (1925)

A horror directed by Rupert Julian, starring Lon Chaney.
A deformed man "haunts" the opera house, manipulating events to cause the success of one of the singers in an attempt to make her love him. He kidnaps the star twice, but her boyfriend finds out and enters the basement to save her.
This film is a lot like Nosferatu in that it's silent with classical music and text screens. The music in this one is much better, but the villain is a little lame. What would really be funny is The Phantom of the Grand Ole Opry complete with a deformed redneck and country soundtrack. For what this movie is, I'm rating it o.k. for shallow plot and characters, but decent music.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Freedom Writers (2007)

A drama directed by Richard LaGravenese for MTV films.
A new teacher gets unruly high school students to take an interest in her class.
This is one of those films that slips through my radar when I'm selecting what to watch. MTV is owned by Viacom, which used to be CBS and the ownership pyramid just continues from there. Why don't I trust a multinational corporation to make movies for me to watch? Because the ownership of the corporation can be traced back to any one of 13 ruling elite families that control the world. So what? These are the same groups of people who have depopulation goals WRITTEN IN STONE! These people stage false flag terror attacks and then appoint themselves to investigate after their lies are questioned.
Oh yeah, the movie...
It seemed like a Dead Poets' Society clone that got updated. The musical score was designed to be a tear jerker with popular music added to boost album sales. I really had a hard time seeing how the "dancing in the classroom" scene could be justified any other way. A decent plot brings this up to o.k..

The Last Man on Earth (1964)

A science fiction horror directed by Ubaldo Ragona and Sidney Salkow, starring Vincent Price.
A strange disease kills everyone except Vincent Price and turns them into vampire-zombies.
This would have worked better as an episode of The Twilight Zone. It dragged on for a little too long and got more than a little annoying. I'm rating it poor because it just wasn't good.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Scarface (1932)

A crime drama directed by Howard Hawks.
A gangster rises through the ranks of a crime syndicate and abusively tries to keep his sister out of trouble.
This is a rare case of the remake being about as good as the original. I had already seen the Al Pacino film when I watched this, so I was comparing all the way through. This one has that irreplaceable early gangster flick rawness to it where the later film has better production value. My favorite part was when Tony discovers the machine gun and the montage of drive-by shootings occurs. I'm rating it adequate and worthy because of the primitive method in which it was presented, but still having a good plot.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Deathstalker (1983)

An adventure directed by James Sbardellati.
An outlaw is guided by a witch to get a sword and defeat the magician/ruler of the land and "unite the 3 pieces".
The music in this is pretty epical and almost Conan-ish. The cover DOES reflect the breast size of the women in the film! Otherwise, there is nothing worth watching. I'm rating it poor because good boobs and good music can't redeem a bad movie.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Hell's Angels (1930)

A war film directed by Howard Hughes, James Whale and Edmund Goulding.
Two brothers drink, compete for women and fight in the first world war.
This was a long and boring waste of time. The best part was when the German blimp had to shed some weight and started tossing soldiers overboard. Other than that, it's a very bad idea to watch this. The only reason that I'm not declaring shite is that the women are ABSOLUTE SCORCHERS! Therefore, bad. Don't watch.

King Kong (1933)

A fantasy directed by Merian C. Cooper and Ernest B. Schoedsack, starring Fay Wray.
A film director finds a leading woman for his new movie and takes her to a mysterious island. On the island, the native people provide human brides for a giant ape and kidnap the woman in an attempt to give her to the ape. The film crew and sailors chase the ape when he captures the woman and both parties have run-ins with prehistoric beasts. They eventually capture the ape and bring him to New York city where he escapes captivity and picks up the woman again.
I've seen the 2005 remake of this and I've got to say that I prefer the 1933 version. Marcel Delgado made the monsters for this film and they look very similar to Ray Harryhausen's creations. The scenes on the wild half of the island are my favorite as raw vegan dinosaurs turn carnivorous and attack the humans. On the "new world order symbolism" side of things, when Fay Wray puts on the dress, there is a dangling phallus-like accessory on it that amused the hell out of me. I'm rating it worthy, which is more than the 2005 remake could ever hope to get. Suck on that, Hollywood!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Nosferatu (1922)

A horror directed by F. W. Murnau.
A young businessman goes to Transylvania to meet a client who is buying property in his home town. The client turns out to be a vampire who brings death wherever he goes.
I remember this film being all black and white, but the version that I'm reviewing here had tinted colors over whole scenes. I am unsure if this is the original as Wikipedia didn't mention color schemes in it's article. It is a silent film with an annoying musical score and screens of nearly indecipherable text to read. There were a few audio gasps from the Mina character (who has a different name in this version). I found myself thinking of humorous dialogue for the characters. An example:
Dracula (Orlock) and the male lead are eating dinner when the protagonist cuts his finger.
Orlock: "Let me kiss your booboo, Johnny!"
I'm rating it o.k. because it is a classic film, but some of it gets annoying.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

It Happened One Night (1934)

A drama directed by Frank Capra.
A rich woman runs away from her family and joins up with a regular traveler. As they make their way towards New York, her family searches for her and the relationship between the 2 travelers deepens.
This is a perfect example of what I mean by plot, setting and characters value. For fuck's sake, it's made in 1934, but it's a damn good film. The story is told very well and without any Hollywood bullshit. Mock me if you wish, but I know a good movie when I see one. That's why I'm running this film blog and you're not!

Frankenstein (1931)

A horror directed by James Whale, starring Boris Karloff.
A scientist steals dead people and a brain to reanimate. When his plan works, the resulting creation can't be controlled.
This was in black and white on fullscreen. It reminded me of old Twilight Zone episodes. At least it was short, so I'm rating it poor because it's not really worth watching.

Monday, October 18, 2010

The Twilight Samurai (2002)

A drama directed by Yoji Yamada.
A destitute samurai lives with his 2 daughters and his senile mother. A damsel in distress shows up, but he declines the offer to marry her. When he is assigned by his clan to kill a dangerous man, he reconsiders his choice about marriage.
If you're looking for THE "good guy", this is him. He's filthy, unshaven, stinks, his clothes are ragged, he declines bar invitations in favor of going home to his family, he works so much that he has no time to clean himself... a classic poor samurai with a family. There were subtitles to read, but they came with the film and it was pretty long. I really like this type of thing, so I'm rating it green. Some of our "action-oriented" samurai fans might get bored, but plot and characters are better than fighting.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Ziegfeld Girl (1941)

A musical directed by Robert Z. Leonard, starring Judy Garland.
New showgirls are recruited by a famous Broadway show and have problems when their whole lives change because of the show.
The music was less than good, but Judy Garland (hot as ever) gave a great performance. One of the other girls who I'm nicknaming "tank girl" likes alcohol a little too much and serves as comic relief. She stumbles, falls and passes out on queue. I'm rating it poor because Judy didn't succeed in transmuting the silver screen to mercury on this one.

The Deer Hunter (1978)

A drama by Michael Cimino, staring Robert De Niro, Christopher Walken and Meryl Streep.
American steel workers in Pennsylvania are being good old American guys. One gets married, they go hunting, they drink like fish... Then they go to Vietnam. Things get a little darker at this point as they are forced to play Russian Roulette.
This 3 hour epic has everything. A marriage, a party, the Vietnam war, deer hunting and best of all, Christopher Walken blowing his brains out! I clapped and cheered at that part! Overall, it's a great film for anyone who wants to see all the best movies. I'm giving it an awesome, purple rating (the Walken beast's death scene has a lot to do with this.)

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Heavy Metal (1981)

A science fiction directed by Gerald Potterton.
A series of short stories follow an evil orb called the Loc-Nar through time and space where it is fought over and causes disaster wherever it goes.
This is a great movie for young men as it features sex, violence, drugs and an energetic musical score. Remember when I was disappointed with the breasts in Barbarian Queen? The ones in this film look like what's on the cover. I would have used REAL heavy metal for the soundtrack if I had made it, but it's still cool. Just imagine how much better it would be with the powerful sound of bands like Slayer, Manowar, Iron Maiden... you get the idea. Good movie! Green rating!

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Willow (1988)

A fantasy written and produced by George Lucas, directed by Ron Howard.
A human baby is found in a "small people" or "peck" (to quote from the film) village and an aspiring sorcerer must take the child to where she will be safe. With the help of friends who he meets along the way, they defeat the evil army and sorceress who want to capture and kill the child.
This is one of those classic 80s films that everyone sees and everyone loves. The characters and setting were very good. I like it, but it doesn't have that extra oomph to put it into green status, so worthy is a perfectly good rating for this.

Friday, October 8, 2010

Ran (1985)

A drama by Akira Kurosawa.
A leader steps down from power so that his oldest of 3 sons can rule the land. The shit then promptly hits the fan as war breaks out in a land where the father had just spent 50 years at war to bring peace.
Political intrigue and betrayal run rampant as the film progresses. The sky tends to change with the mood of the plot and state of politics. People who the father had done horrible things to turn out to be the only ones that he can trust as he goes insane. In a brief moment of comic relief, the court jester makes a helmet for the downtrodden ruler (picture). I'm rating it good because I liked it. There are lots of subtitles to read, but that shouldn't scare you away from this good movie. It's all plot, characters and settings without any Hollywood bullshit.

Barbarian Queen (1985)

An adventure directed by Hector Olivera.
Female warriors have their village raided by an army and some of their friends are captured. They go to defeat the army and rescue their friends.
Look at the cover art! It's better than the movie! This film is really cheesy with some of the fakest fighting I've ever seen. I could go on a rant about the types of breasts shown on the cover vs what is seen on screen, but the whole film is like that. You can't judge a book by the cover, so that applies to movies too. I'm declaring shite for false advertising.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Machete (2010)

An action by Robert Rodriguez.
A Mexican who is a federale gets mixed up in political agendas involving extreme amounts of violence.
This is supposed to be some type of illuminati trick flick to put a spin on some issue, but if it's viewed as just an action film, it kicks ass. From the intestine rope swing to the gatling gun on the motorcycle, I was cracking up. I'm rating it good for entertainment value alone.

Tank Girl (1995)

An adventure directed by Rachel Talalay.
In a post apocalyptic world, a slut is captured by the global corporation of water and power. She escapes and fights back against them with the help of the rippers (kangaroo men).
I watched this for illuminati symbolism and predictive programming. Guess what? I found it! The musical number, "Let's Do It" performed on a masonic checkerboard floor reminded me of Madonna inducting her starlets. Phallic symbols never ended as a male hero role was played by a woman. Everything looked messy and crappy mid 90s pop music played through the entire feature. On the good side, it is a very entertaining film to watch. There's lots of action and beautiful women, so it lands on o.k. because of the balance of entertainment and evil.

The Last Starfighter (1984)

A science fiction directed by Nick Castle.
A young man who is addicted to a video game is recruited by aliens to fight a real battle in space.
The characters were good and the plot was pretty cool. It was a little cliche as far as 80s science fiction goes. I'm rating it worthy because I liked watching it.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Zu Warriors from the Magic Mountain (1983)

A kung fu directed by Tsui Hark.
A soldier stumbles into an ancient battle between good and evil. He is taken as the apprentice of one of the good warriors and must find the twin blades to defeat the blood demon.
This is one of the cheesiest kung fus ever made. The special effects are hysterical and the fights are fought in almost a Dragonball Z style. Some of the characters like Longbrows are absolutely absurd. I'm rating it worthy because it made me chuckle a little. If you like this, check my posts labeled "kung fu" and I'm sure you'll find more things like it.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

White Fang (1991)

An adventure directed by Randal Kleiser.
A young gold digger befriends a wolf.
The setting of this film was great and everything looks really good. The plot is a little hokey, but for a Disney film, it's not too bad. I'm giving it worthy based on video aspects alone.

Plan 9 from Outer Space (1959)

A science fiction directed by Ed Wood, starring Bella Lugosi and Vampira.
UFOs are sighted and the aliens on them use dead Earth people as weapons.
Everyone says this was the worst movie ever made, but it really isn't. I've seen MUCH worse (Some Kind of Monster). Turns out, it's just a crappy b movie. I'm rating it not so great anyway, but it's far from the worst.

Until the End of the World (1991)

A drama by Wim Wenders.
A small group of people chase eachother around the world until they all meet in Australia. While they are there, a nuclear satellite is destroyed and they believe that they are the only ones left on earth.
This is actually a trilogy of parts, so it's very long. The female lead is very attractive regardless of her hair color (which changes sometimes) and there are a few male main characters, one of which is Sam Neill. The plot is a meandering series of events that seems a little "thrown together". Overall, it's not too shabby. I'm rating it worthy.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Krull (1983)

A fantasy directed by Peter Yates.
A prince has his bride stolen at their wedding and is led by a mystic on a quest to reclaim his land and woman.
The special effects are super cheesy, but the costumes and settings are great. The plot and characters lack depth, but that's what's expected from 80s fantasy. I'm rating it o.k. for being mildly entertaining.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Ghoulies 2 (1988)

A horror directed by Albert Band.
Small demons sneak into a carnival when one of the trailers stops at a gas station. They cause mischief in the spook house for a little while until they escape onto the grounds.
The monsters looked better in this one, but it's still the same cheesy 80s horror that you would expect. One of the monsters makes an annoying cat noise throughout the film that kind of pissed me off. It borders on comedy, so I'm rating it o.k.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Garbage Warrior (2007)

A documentary directed by Oliver Hodge.
An architect faces legal troubles over his building of completely self-sustaining houses.
This film was very pretty despite the structures being built from trash like bottles, cans and tires. The colored glass in the walls was my favorite element of the buildings, followed shortly by their off-the-grid qualities. If you're looking for a very positive documentary, this is it. I'm rating it good for looks and basically good ideas.

The Secrets of Scientology (2010)

A documentary by John Sweeney.
John talks to ex-scientologists in an effort to prove that the church is a "dangerous cult".
BBC can't be trusted and the whole thing looked very staged and scripted. It seemed like a work of fiction to me. Seeing how documentaries are supposed to be non-fiction, I can't prevent this from getting a bad score.

The Princess Bride (1987)

A fantasy directed by Rob Reiner.
A very young Fred Savage (of Wonder Years fame) is sick and his grandfather shows up to read him book. In the book, a girl falls in love with a farm boy who leaves and is captured by pirates. The girl accidentally (and against her will) becomes betrothed to the evil prince. She is then captured by a group of men who want to start a war and rescued by a pirate who turns out to be the farm boy. The farm boy is killed by the prince and resurrected by 2 of the war mongers who turn out to be cool guys. One of them has a grudge against one of the prince's men and they storm the castle to make everything right again.
This is in the running for best film ever made. The plot, setting and character development are absolutely perfect. There's not much more to be said that wouldn't just be repeated praise of this, so I'm giving it a white "best films ever" rating.

The Howling series (1981 - 1995)

A horror directed by Joe Dante, Philipe Mora, John Hough, Neal Sundstrom, Hope Perello and Clive Turner.
Werewolves kill humans and when someone finds out what's really going on, they are met with disbelief until nearly everyone is dead.
There was a range of quality in these films from o.k. to total shit. At best, they were cheesy 80s horror (and not the good kind). At worst, they feature no real actors, lots of country music, bad jokes and line dancing in the dark. Overall, the first one is alright, but the rest of the series is a roller coaster ride to a train wreck finish in number 7. I'm rating it bad.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Drunken Dragon (1985)

A kung fu directed by Chiu Chung-Hing.
A terrible murderer is roaming the land and when a man's grandmother becomes the target, he goes to study with her brother to defeat the enemy.
This was so cheesy and so lame! There was no drinking and no drunken boxing. Normally, this would result in a bad score, but there was so much slapstick humor that I can't rate it bad. Be happy that it's getting orange.