Friday, April 20, 2012

Star Wreck In The Pirkinning (2005)

A Finnish science fiction comedy by Samuli Trossonen.
A space captain who is stuck in the past goes to Russia and builds a spaceship with which he conquers the world. When things are not going well on Earth, he goes back into space to look for things to conquer.
This is actually one of the better free movies available. The plot and characters make sense and the humor is good. Everything is named with a pun that I found amusing. The style and production value were not bad at all. I'm hesitantly giving this a good rating. It wasn't really up my alley, but it was made very well.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Route 66 an American Bad Dream (2004)

A German documentary directed by Stefan Kluge.
A trio of young German men travel to the united states to drive an old Cadillac across the country. The car turns out to be problematic and they spend more time fixing it than driving.
This was actually a decent film. The production value was good, but the style was too artsy-fartsy and screwed up the presentation. The characters were not developed at all, but the plot was good. It was a balance of good and bad things that I can live with. It earned an adequate rating.

Pentagon (2008)

A crime film by Davor Radic.
A pair of young women are holding hostages and drinking booze. A hit man wanders aimlessly.
This film was nearly plotless. The production value was absolutely bad. I liked the characters and it gets alcohol points. I'm rating it poor.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Oceania (2008)

A film by Harry Dehal.
Some strange sexual situations cause problems for people.
The plot was muddy and unclear. The characters were not developed. The style was overly artsy-fartsy. The production value was great. Let's call it a golden piece of shit. I'm rating it bad. Hoping for a picture? tough luck. I can't find any either.

Seven Dead Men (2009)

A crime drama by Brett Koonce.
pairs of people in seemingly unrelated situations turn out to all be involved in the same crime deal.
BORING! The plot was generally hidden and the characters were involved in such mundane tasks. The production value was like a porno without the music. I'm rating this bad.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

The Tunnel (2011)

An Australian horror directed by Carlo Ledesma.
A reporter hears of conflict over using underground areas as water storage because of the homeless people living in them and disappearing. She chases after the story and sneaks a film crew into the area to investigate.
This was the scariest thing I've seen in a LONG time. It was done Blair Witch style, with a news camera and a hand-held, so it looks very real. Alternating with this is interview segments that make it look more like a documentary. The underground maze gives the film a great creepy setting and provides the possibility of the characters becoming lost. It scared the shit out of me, so I'm rating it best.

Monday, April 16, 2012

Riverpool (2010)

A film by Davor Radic.
A woman walks through a city.
There was no sound and there was no plot. I turned it off at 32 minutes. Rating it shit.

Point of Departure (2005)

A German mystery by Retsina Film.
A group of people wake up naked in a hotel bed together. The try to figure out what's going on and why they are there.
Initially, I thought that the video was terrible quality, but it's just dark. As the film progresses, it gets lighter and things become visible. The plot was unique and the characters were alright. The style is good and the production value turned out to be not so bad. This is a pretty good film and totally legal for anyone to traffic any way they want. I'm rating it adequate.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

The Yes Men Fix the World (2009)

An English documentary by Andy Bichlbaum and Mike Bonanno.
2 men pose as representatives of large companies and propose ideas that clash with the mentality of the companies.
I thought this was a great documentary. All of the information on what was going on was given in a coherent manner. The makers were trying to do something good for bad companies, but they got caught every time. They were trying to do what the companies themselves should have done in these scenarios. Obviously the didn't end up fixing the world because the world is still eft up. I'm rating this good because these people think for themselves.

Zenith (2010)

An American psychological thriller by Vladan Nikolic.
A young man is given a video made by an older man who was researching the Illuminati and conspiracies. The young man tries to find the whole series of videos in order to watch the whole story.
I was able to get the first 2 parts of the film legally, so that's all I can review. What I saw was great. The plot and characters were very interesting. The style was cool and the production value was high quality. I'm rating it awesome. It would get a best rating if I were able to watch the entire film.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Unknown Island (1948)

An American science fiction adventure directed by Jack Bernhard.
A Man and his girlfriend hire a ship's captain to take them to an island populated by dinosaurs. The captain knows a man who says he escaped from that island and he is brought along against his will.
The dinosaurs look SO FAKE! It's almost funny how bad they are. The plot and characters were alright. The style was clear, but the production value was not good at all. I'm rating it o.k.

Monday, April 2, 2012

Vengeance Valley (1951)

A western directed by Richard Thorpe, starring Burt Lancaster.
A cattle herder causes multiple types of trouble for people he knows when he overdraws a bank account, gives the money to a woman who will not identify the father of her child, starts a fight between the woman's brothers and his brother and then tries to sell his boss' cattle behind his back.
The plot was complex and the characters were hard to keep track of. The style was definitely unclear and the production value was bad. Since I can't say anything nice about this film, I'm rating it bad.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

The Little Shop of Horrors (1960)

An American comedy horror by Roger Corman.
A young man who works in a flower shop grows a plant that eats people.
The plot and characters were pretty simple. The sense of humor was a little odd and I didn't find it funny. The production value was low. I'm rating this poor.

The Boat (1921)

An American comedy by Buster Keaton.
A man builds a boat indoors and wrecks the building when getting it out. He takes his family to an undefined body of water and together they launch and sail the boat.
The boat is called the Damfino and this is used as a running joke through the film, implying the phrase "damned if I know". I'm rating the film o.k. and this is the LAST Buster Keaton film I'm reviewing. I'm getting tired of them and it's preposterous to watch a 30 minute film and review it.

Sherlock, Jr. (1924)

An American comedy by Buster Keaton.
The projectionist at a movie theater is trying to be a detective.
This was another silent film full of physical humor. In one scene, the main character walks into the movie screen and interacts with the film that is being projected. In another, he is riding on the handlebars of a police motorcycle when the policeman falls off and the motorcycle keeps going with the main character perched on the front. The motorcycle rides through some dangerous areas and has a few close calls with disaster. I'm rating this adequate.