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Thursday, May 18, 2017

Dracula vs. Frankenstein A.K.A. Blood of Frankenstein, The Revenge of Dracula (1971)

An American horror directed by Al Adamson, starring J. Carrol Naish and Lon Chaney Jr.
A mad scientist is abducting young women to make a syrum for his werewolf or Dracula or Frankenstein. A woman's relative is missing and she teams up with hippies. It's a mess.
I got the wrong movie. I was looking for Jess Franco's Dracula Contra Frankenstein from the same year. This seemed just like a Franco flick until I started doing research for my review. The camera-work sucked, psychedelic soundtrack, amazing tits, you could have fooled me. It did not hold my attention at all. The video was so bad that I did not want to look at the screen. The audio was bad, but not horrid. Worst of all, Dracula was sleazy! He's not supposed to have facial hair. As usual, I could type trash about it longer than necessary. I rate this bad. DO NOT WATCH!!!

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Chakushin Ari Final A.K.A. One Missed Call Final (2006)

A Japanese horror thriller directed by Manabu Asou.
A group of college students on a class trip receive messages on their phones from a girl who they used to pick on. The messages indicate that the receiver will die soon. One student reveals a secret about her past that changes the message sending girl.
This was not so hot. The plot went almost nowhere. It was coherent, but one of the more static plots I've seen. The characters were pitifully shallow. It may have been a "lost in translation" issue there. The video was alright, but nothing stood out as being good. I won't comment on the audio because it was in Japanese, but the subtitles that came with the version I watched were horrible. Overall, a lackluster and mediocre film. I rate it tolerable.

Friday, April 14, 2017

A Virgin Among the Living Dead (1973)

A Spanish French thriller directed by Jesus Franco, starring Howard Vernon and Paul Muller.
A young woman goes to visit her crazy family for the reading of her father's will.
I have a feeling that Jesus Franco either did not want to make good movies or had a vastly different definition of "good" from mine. The little plot there was in this mostly didn't make sense. I could positively identify two characters. Maybe more if I really tried. The pacing dragged sluggishly through even the shortest scenes. Video was artsy, but not in a good way. It seemed very much a product of the time, a '70s film to only be viewed in the '70s. The audio was in English. Soundtrack music fit Jesus Franco's style, being similar to some Russ Meyer flicks and Cannibal Holocaust. The scene depicted above was a tease. That means no, she did not use this item for it's intended purpose. Overall, just like every other Jesus Franco film I've seen. I rate this poor.

Saturday, April 1, 2017

Nemesis 2: Nebula (1995)

A Danish American science fiction action directed by Albert Pyun, starring Sue Price.
A genetic mutant's mother flees the future with her baby and travels back in time to 1980s Africa. The mother is killed, but the daughter is raised by an African tribe to be a warrior. A monster/cyborg from the future finds the mutant woman. Conflict ensues.
This was pretty crappy. The plot made almost no sense at all and was not communicated very clearly. Only the main character had a name. I think this illustrates how little character development there was. Sue Price had not reached the level of bodybuilding in which we see her in Nemesis 4, so she still looked female and not like He-Man. The video looked so bad that it was almost TROMA-esque and the audio was no better. The special effects were poorly done, but they included a ripple effect around the antagonist and a magic knife. The subtitles that I got were crap and this made a working knowledge of African language necessary to understand the first third of the film. Overall, you would really be better off watching something else. I rate this poor.

Friday, March 31, 2017

The Music of Chance (1993)

An American drama directed by Philip Haas, starring James Spader, Mandy Patinkin, M. Emmet Walsh and Charles Durning.
A pair of strangers meet. One of them is a gambler and the other has money to bet. They go in together on a card game against millionaires who seem easy prey. When they lose, the gamblers agree to build a wall for the millionaires, but things don't seem quite right.
This was pretty cool. The plot definitely held my interest and the characters were developed amazingly well in a relatively short amount of time. I think the steady pace is what made all the difference. Events take place at regular intervals and the rise and fall of action and pacing is minimal. The video was expertly done to the point that, even with my editing experience and critical eye, it looked seamless. The audio was mostly good. There were a few sections of quieter dialogue and louder music, but not enough to cause a problem. The classical music soundtrack was definitely appreciated. Overall, quite a nice flick that I enjoyed watching. I rate it adequate.

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Return of the Living Dead: Necropolis (2005)

An American made for TV horror directed by William Butler and Aaron Strongoni, starring Cory Hardrict and Peter Coyote.
A group of high school students follow rumors of an injured friend being abducted by a chemical company. When they get to the factory, a zombie outbreak occurs.
This is where they lost the magic of the original. I didn't care about any of the stereotypical characters who barely had any back-story. The poorly constructed and underdeveloped plot did not hold my interest. The video looked made for TV and syfy channel all the way. Same with the audio that featured popular hard rock music of the time. Technically speaking, the audio and video were fine, but they were handled badly. The camera-work focused on fast editing cuts that are all too cliche of modern action films. Now that I've seen the whole series, I wish I hadn't. Only the first three films are worth watching. I rate this poor.

Troll 3 A.K.A. The Crawlers, Creepers, Contamination Point 7 (1993)

An Italian Canadian American horror directed by Joe D'Amato and Fabrizio Laurenti.
Because a nuclear power plant dumped toxic waste in a forest, the roots and vines have mutated and attack people.
I could accept Troll 2 having goblins. They may not have been trolls, but at least they were mythological humanoid characters. The acting and lighting were it's worst aspects. Camera-work followed closely behind. The only good thing in the whole film was Paula, the hooker. This movie was worse than Troll 2 because you can mock that easily, but this is more difficult to poke fun at because it's just bad. Overall, it's not worth watching at all for any reason. I rate this bad. DO NOT WATCH!