An American comedy horror directed by James Muro, produced and written by Roy Frumkes.A liquor store owner finds a box of old hobo-wine in his cellar and begins selling it. The hobos that drink it instantly liquify and die. Meanwhile, an undercover cop is trying to get rid of a hobo-overlord who lives in a junkyard. The cop is also on the case of a woman who was killed in the junkyard after being taken away from a fancy restaurant by a hobo when she was drunk. The doorman of the restaurant has gotten on the bad side of his boss, who thinks he's in the mafia, for letting the hobo take the woman.This is quite a piece of cinema! The main character is a hobo who tries to drink the poison wine at every opportunity, but is always prevented from doing so. There is a game of "keep away" with a severed penis and a special song during the closing credits (don't turn it off early). I'm rating this awesome for being totally unique. You've heard of "a diamond in the rough", well in this case, the rough is the diamond.
A Japanese sports drama directed by Fumihiko Sori.Young men compete at table tennis. The 2 main characters have known each other since they were children.The plot and characters were good. I liked the style a lot and the production value was alright. I'm not really one for sports films, but this one was pretty good. I'm rating it adequate.
An American fantasy romantic comedy directed by Marc Forster, starring Will Ferrell, Dustin Hoffman and Queen Latifah.A taxman goes about his boring life until he hears a voice narrating it. When the voice announces that he is going to die, he seeks the help of a psychiatrist who tries to help him figure out what's going on.The plot and characters were great and the style was good as well. Dustin Hoffman played a very similar role to that which he played in I Heart Huckabees. I really liked the film and thought it was unique. There was only one problem: Will Ferrell doesn't die. I only spoil the ending because I want him to die in real life. A violent, agonizing, painful, horrible death. He's worse than Christopher Walken. To illustrate this point, in the film he chooses a guitar. What does he choose? A fucking Stratocaster! He looks right past the shred guitar in front of it (probably Ibanez or Jackson) to the poorly engineered strat. What a mainstream twit! I'm rating this good because even Will Ferrell couldn't fuck it up.
A horror directed by James Isaac.A boy is about to turn 13 years old when a group of bikers attacks his family, hoping to take him away from them. Nanna pulls hard caliburs and a gunfight ensues. It turns out that most of the characters are werewolves and the boy is supposedly magic.Stupid movie, but I liked grandma's guns. They looked like what Roland in Stephen King's Dark Tower series would carry. They were always in someone's hands, so I couldn't see if they had sandalwood grips. I don't give gunslinger points like I do with CG monsters and female anatomy, so this gets a poor rating.
A horror directed by E. Elias Merhige, starring John Malkovich and Willem Dafoe.A group of men are making a vampire movie when they discover that their fake vampire is real.The plot and characters were a little predictable, as they were pretending to be making a film that I've already seen. The style fit the film very well and the production value was good. Willem Dafoe did a good job as Count Orlok and I liked how John Malkovich directed his actors when they were filming scenes. However, the whole thing was a little on the boring side. I'm rating it adequate.
An American comedy horror by Jonathan Yudis.A young man goes to his father's house in the desert to spend the summer. The father keeps the company of prostitutes and has an art studio where he makes meat sculptures.Boobs, breasts, titties and bosoms! I think the breasts in this film got more screen time than in Showgirls. They were definitely emphasized more anyway. The plot and characters were cheesy and the acting was terrible. The style was comical, keeping in line with the premise of the film. Oh, and did I mention the boobs? As with "CG monster points", I'm creating "female anatomy points" and this film gets raised to an o.k. rating because of that.
An American Comedy directed by Jessy Terrero, starring Snoop Dogg and Method Man.When a black man gets his butt stuck in an airplane toilet, the plane has an accident and his dog gets sucked through one of the motors. When he lands, he sues the airline and starts his own with the money he wins. A white family rides the all black airline, piloted by Snoop Dogg.I wouldn't wish this movie on my worst enemy. The characters were stereotypical and the plot was like a sit-com. The pace was really terrible too, as the scenes bounced around the plane between characters. I have to rate this bad.
